For Shannon.......

This is for Shannon and any of my other Wyo high school friends who read this. If you are not from or familiar with Wyoming, this isn't as funny - but it's still pretty funny.

WYOMING BARBIES

Jackson Barbie:This modern day homemaker Barbie is available with a Mercedes 4WD SUV, a Prada handbag and matching Nike Yoga ensemble. She has a masters degree and double-majored, but has the luxury of being a stay-at-home mom with Ken's generous salary. Comes with Percocet prescription and Botox. Starbucks mug and traffic-jamming Blackberry internet/cell phone device sold separately. Husband Ken is into fishing, golfing, baseball and is often "working late." Available at all Seattle-area Starbucks retailers.

Teton Village Barbie: This princess Barbie is only sold at Nordstrom. She comes with an assortment of Kate Spade handbags, your choice of a BMW convertible or Hummer H2 and a long-haired foreign lapdog named "Honey." Also available is her Cookie cutter development dream house. Available with or without tummy tuck, facelift, and breast augmentation. Workaholic, cheating husband, Ken, comes with a Porsche.

Rock Springs Barbie: This recently paroled Barbie comes with a 9mm handgun, switchblade, '78 El Camino with dark tinted windows, and a meth lab kit. This model is available only after dark and can only be purchased with cash--preferably small bills, unless you're a cop, then we don't know what you're talking about. Boyfriend Ken is in rehab. Available at many pawn shops.

Rawlins Barbie: This tobacco chewing, brassy-haired Barbie comes with a pair of high heeled sandals with one broken heel from the time she chased Beer Gut Ken out of Cheyenne Barbie's trailer. Her ensemble includes low-rise acid-washed jeans, fake fingernails, strawberry lip gloss and a see-through halter top. Purchase her Mustang convertible separately and get a confederate flag bumper sticker absolutely free. Boyfriend Ken is in the State Prison. Available at Army/Navy Surplus.

Cheyenne Barbie: This pale model comes dressed in her own Wrangler jeans 2 sizes too small, steel-toes cowboy boots , a Willie Nelson T-shirt and a Tweety Bird tattoo on her shoulder. She has fake fingernails, a six pack of Budweiser, and a Hank Williams, Jr. CD set. She can spit over a distance of 6 feet and kick PRCA cowboy Ken's ass when she is drunk. Also available is the gold-toned cubic zirconium ring Ken gave her after another one of his "episodes" with his boss's daughter. Comes with Barbie's Dream Double Wide Trailer. Available at Wal-Mart.

Gillette Barbie: Pregnant at purchase, this Barbie cones with a stroller and bus pass. Also included is a G.E.D. and a completely filled out food stamps form. Construction worker Ken and his '82 Caddy are optional. Available at Value Villa.

Laramie Barbie: This Barbie is made out of recycled plastic and tofu. She has long straight brown hair, archless feet, hairy armpits, no make-up, and Birkenstocks with white socks. She does not want or need a Ken doll. If you purchase the optional Subaru Wagon, you will receive a free rainbow flag sticker. Available at REI.

Lander Barbie: This versatile doll can be easily converted from Barbie to Ken by simply adding or removing snap on parts. Walks to work. Likes to "experiment," but will never commit. This model is being phased out and is only available from the manufacture.

Cody Barbie: This Barbie is a transplant from California and moved into the area to "get away from the big city." She comes with a 10 acre "ranch" on the South Fork and a 1-ton crew cab diesel truck that she drives the kids to school in. She moved here to live in the beautiful and low populated west, but now doesn't want anyone else to move here because they will ruin the area. Retired lawyer Ken comes with his own cowboy outfit so he can act like he is a local and "fit in." This model is sold at any main street art gallery in Cody, and there are several to choose from.

Green River Barbie: Comes in 2 choices, 1) See Rock Springs Barbie, 2)Comes with Ken and 10 children, minivan and Sunday best clothing. Optional LDS church and missionaries are sold separately. Available at any Deseret Bookstore. A free copy of the Book Of Mormon is also included with Choice 2.

Pinedale Barbie: Comes with oily coveralls, muddy work truck, can of Cope,and Tool-pusher Ken. Optional drilling rig also available. Sold at any roadside gas station.

Evanston Barbie: Comes with years of mental instability, and a straight jacket. Accessories also include a bottle of morphine, a bed pan, and an imaginary friend. Psychologist Ken is sold separately with Ken's happy-time psycho couch. Available at any hospital

Bridger Valley Barbie: Comes with 5 sheep, a llama, and her blue '82 Chevy pickup with a brown door. Boyfriend/cousin Ken sold separately. Available at any feed store.

I have put a bunch of new posts on here today, so you'll have to scroll down to see all of them!

From the mouths of babes...

I have been meaning to write a post recording some of the funnier things my kids have said. These are not things I want to forget, and maybe you will smile at them too.
#1: Christmas Eve - Kaydin is 4 years old. We tell Kaydin "You need to go to sleep, Santa won't come unless you are asleep." Shortly thereafter, I go stand outside Kaydin's bedroom window and ring some jingle bells. I return to the house and say "Kaydin, did you hear those jingle bells? That might be Santa - you'd better get to sleep!" Kaydin's response? "Or it could have been someone outside my window ringing some bellls". The kid was 4!
#2: Afters spending a long, summer day outside at the annual Foyer de Sion orphanage reunion (this is a reunion for all the kids who have been adopted from the same orphanage our kids were)- Kelly has a sunburn and says "mom, I was in the sun too long, I think I might be turning black!" And Maryn, who is Haitian, says - completely serious, I might add "I think I am too!"
#3: An exchange between Rylynn and Joseph, who were shopping together:
Rylynn: Dad, I need to try on some clothes. You don't have to buy them, I just want to try them on.
Joseph: Rylynn, we don't have time for that!
Rylynn: Dad, I think you need to show me a little more respect, and show me that you love me!
Rylynn is 6.
#4: Another gem from Kaydin, who came home from his first week of first grade with a frowny face on his behavior report. "Kaydin, why do you have a frowny face"
"I wasn't following the rule" says Kaydin. "But it's a stupid rule"
My mom response is "Kaydin, rules have to be followed whether you think they're stupid or not. What rule did you break?"
"I was running out to recess and you can't run on your way out to recess. That's just dumb, I am way more likely to get hurt AT recess than running out to recess."
How is that for 6 year-old analytical thinking?

Ha ha!

Rylynn wanted me to take a picture of her on our monkey bars. As I was snapping away, and she was swinging away her pants started falling off! Priceless!

Random fun-ness (Is that a word?)

Here are some pics of what we've been up to this week. A fun girls' shopping trip in Provo. It was supposed to be in Park City, but we couldn't find it. Yes, I am that dumb. We are members at the Clearfield Aquatic Center (it's sweet) so we are there almost every weekend.

Joseph, Kellyn and Kaydin.

Trevin holding Goob (aka Ewan)

Rylynn at the Aquatic Center. You can't tell, but I swear, it's her!

Tristan swimming. He is SOOOO dark it is hard to photograph him!


Kellyn, modeling a necklace in Rue 21.

Kellyn, Mom and Aunt Nikki on our shopping trip. Holy Kanye West!

WHOA!!! Calm down, people

Here are Rylynn and Ewan with Scout. I am not pregnant

Perhaps I should have clarified sooner. I am NOT pregnant. The new addition to our family is a DOG. Did everyone get that? A DOG! I am not stupid enough to be pregnant right now. Let me clarify: being pregnant is not stupid. Having more than 8 kids is not stupid. But since life is almost more than I can handle right now, getting pregnant would be very stupid right now for me. So all you prego ladies, don't get offended. No, no, our new addition is a shih tzu named Scout. Aunt Stina was kind enough to find him for us, and we love him. Even Neville (our cat) loves him.

Life at the Baker house

We are now three weeks into the start of the new school year. I really enjoy the question "aren't you glad to have the kids back in school?" People who ask this don't have kids, or maybe they're just not smart. Having the kids in school makes my day much busier. Picking up, dropping off, volunteering, homework, keeping track of permission slips and other forms, washing and ironing uniforms - oh yeah, I am way more relaxed these days. Don't get me wrong, it's not all bad. I love seeing how excited the kids are when they learn something new, and they are participating in the school choir, which is a lot of fun. Our rides to and from school have become music appreciation time. I loaded my ipod with a bunch of songs for a special "kids playlist" and we listen and discuss the songs. I am also loving my one on one time with Kellyn. She is such a fun kid - who talks nonstop. Joseph is still working a lot, and driving to and from work a lot. I will be going back to work here pretty soon. House still hasn't sold. But life is good. We are all healthy, relatively happy and we have a roof over our heads. I will have some new posts on here soon with our newest addition to the family. It's not what you think!